Whilst I was in Memphis I became a reporter for The Daily Helmsman newspaper for one semester. The University print newspaper had daily editions in both digital and print formats distributed across the city.
The Daily Helmsman
The Daily Helmsman
Becoming an LGBT+ ally: how we can all do better
By Luke Chapman
01/03/19
Becoming an LGBT+ ally doesn’t mean you have to don a pride flag and prance around gay clubs across the country. There are countless ways anyone in any situation can show their support to their LGBT+ friends and loved ones. From coming out to going out there can be a myriad of situations why a member of the LGBT+ community may need moral support.
Coming out is one of the biggest things any LGBT+ person has to face, but there are many things you can do to support this process. To start with, one simple thing we can all do is have a blasé attitude. A genuine belief in “so what?” can be the support you need from a friend or family member. The last thing most people want is a fuss. People want reassurance that it’s not a huge deal, and it’s not going to ruin every relationship they’ve ever built with their friends. It’s normal, it’s ok, and a close friend enforcing that can mean the world. I came out to my closest friend very last, because in my mind, that’s where my life would have changed the most, but the pressure was soon alleviated when it was clear it didn’t change anything, and that’s what is most important.
We all know you don’t have to be gay to show support; it’s the 21st century. Though we live in a more accepting world, there’s a fine line between free speech and hate speech. The support you show doesn’t have to be to your best friend, with the world – in some places – becoming more oppressive for LGBT+ folk, even signing a petition is taking one step forward towards equality. Start a conversation about the military ban of transgender personnel, share a post making people aware of the current “gay purge” taking place in Chechnya, your one click of a button can lead to dozens more becoming educated, and informed. Two people have now been killed in Chechnya and the imprisonment of hundreds of gay men in concentration camps needs to be something we are all talking about. I don’t see this as a battle for gay rights; I see it more as a battle for universal equality.
Although wearing a pride flag isn’t necessarily a requirement under gay law to be an ally, head along to a pride parade and I can guarantee you’ll have a camp ol’ time. LGBT+ events can be some of the most inclusive and entertaining you’ll ever attend, no matter your circumstance it’s something you NEED to be a part of – at least once. Being available for these events can open a lot of doors, it can be hard to make friends within the community, especially if you’re a little younger and a new member. Having someone to explore the best of LGBT+ events with can make a world of difference, and going to see Kylie at Brighton pride wouldn’t be a disadvantage to yourself, you’ll love it!
There does seem to be a slow increase in intolerance within the LGBT+ community. You may have heard the terms “fat-shaming”, “no Asians or blacks” or “femme shaming” (discriminating against feminine acting males), these are all derogatory terms that should be ditched. As a community that has come through so much together, faced so much adversity and battled countless demons, why are we now feeling the need to turn on each other? There is a stigma in the gay community associated with having a gym body, or fitting to appearance stereotypes such as “twink” (a young skinny blonde boy) or “bear” (a hairy usually overweight middle-aged male), but let’s stop this! Let’s all be allies among ourselves and show support to one another.
Being a part of the LGBT+ community can be very lonely. Pride parades, club nights and the ever-growing support seem to portray a happy community, but it can be difficult. With mental health issues rife throughout our community, there is a lot under the surface that you just don’t see. Small gestures really can go a long way, and everyone can do something to support the community. As previously mentioned, though this is a battle for inclusion and equality for LGBT+ members, we can’t do this without straight cis allies. How about we make this a “people” topic, we make it so everyone is equal, there are no purges of any minority group, and there are no bans for certain people in the military, everyone is equal and everyone is welcome, and that’s a target we should all be doing our best to achieve.
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